Stop People Pleasing by Learning to Say No!
🙅♀️ Are you a people pleaser?
People pleasers are the most dependable in the world as they spend their lives giving to others, and rarely say “no” to anyone.
Many times, taking care of everyone else interferes with our own priorities.
Typically, people pleasers want everyone to like them and don’t want others to be angry and saying “no” can lead to feeling guilty.
Guilt is the feeling that we’ve done something wrong!
“If you are guilty, it is because you are attached to judgment, and that judgment is coming from outside of you” according to Psychology Today.
When people pleasers say “yes” out of guilt, it’s very common to feel resentment and victimized.
As adults, when others ask us for our time, we have the ability to say “yes” or “no”.
🛀 If you are saying yes, when you really want to say no, it can get in the way of your own self-care.
What is Self-Care?
VeryWellMind.com describes self-care as “Self-care describes a conscious act one takes in order to promote their own physical, mental, and emotional health. There are many forms self-care may take. It could be ensuring you get enough sleep every night or stepping outside for a few minutes for some fresh air“.
There’s a difference between being generous and being a people pleaser.
✅ Generous people want to do whatever they are asked to do because they genuinely want to do it.
✅ People pleasers are sometimes insecure in relationships and look for external validation and approval from others.
Which one are you?
People Pleasing Is A Choice!
❓Each time you say yes to others, or offer to help in some way, ask yourself why you’re doing it.
Is it because you:
- Have no sense of purpose?
- Are avoiding an uncomfortable feeling?
- Need to be needed?
- Are using it as an escape?
- Crave attention?
- Feel guilty if you say “no”?
- Won’t be liked if you refuse?
- Think no one else can handle it?
- Are shying away from conflict?
😊Being kind is a wonderful quality, but if you continually go out of your way for others at your own expense, it can effect your health.
Again, learn how to say “no”!
It just takes a little practice!
If you weren’t people pleasing, what self-care activity could you focus your time on, putting yourself first?
Please leave a comment!
TOPIC: Stop People Pleasing by Learning to Say No!
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